If the sixth sense is seeing dead people then I?d have to say that women have a seventh sense. Not only can their ovaries detect chocolate from a mile away, but they each have a special homing device within their brains that allows them to know where nearly everything is. Spouses, children and bosses all abuse the seventh sense of the woman with a barrage of questions regarding inanimate objects such as keys, letters, toys and food items. Nine times out of ten the woman is able to give a fairly accurate location for the lost object, provided she has actually ever seen the item in her lifetime. My husband loves to ask me where things are. Sometimes I think he tests me just to see how freaky my location beacon is. He?s been known to ask me about various types of saws and tools of which I have no idea what he?s talking about, much less where the item might be. I give it my best shot though based on his behavioral patterns and I am still able to find most lost objects.
Recently my seventh sense has been docked like the tail of a Doberman. We put our house up for sale. In order to get it ready for pictures and showings, I had to begin boxing up anything unnecessary and hiding everything else. Doing this in a matter of a week has thrown my whole system off kilter. God forbid we actually do sell and move to a new home?I?ll be a wreck. I can?t find anything, including my chocolate. It?s hard enough to function in a home that allows nothing on the counters or floors but to then have to waste time looking for everything is nothing short of maddening.
I understand the logic behind clearing the house of personal belongings in order to make the house appear more spacious and to allow the potential buyer to picture him/herself living there. Logically I get that, but emotionally I want to scream, ?Get an imagination!!!? Does that childless couple REALLY think about the pictures of my kids hanging in the hallway as a poor reflection of the value of the house? If I leave a book on my nightstand is a buyer going to refuse to buy a home that once housed a lover of satire? The realtors should really be more worried about the injury law suit that will come if any potential buyer dares open one of my now overstuffed closets. Don?t even get me started on selling a house with two little boys in residence. When my realtor said that preparing for a showing was as easy as picking up the rugs, wiping down the sinks and putting away my curling iron I couldn?t help but laugh out loud. Perhaps if I were a retired WIDOW this is how my preparation would look, but with a husband and two sons, forget it. I?ve had to develop an eighth sense. This one tells me when the realtor might call with a showing and to remember to put pants on before leaving the house-provided I can find them.
Dana Johnson is a spunky mother of two trying to figure it all out. Running her own business, volunteering at school, trying to keep the family unit clean and fed, and finding time for her are just some of the challenges Dana faces. Like most moms she is tired, underappreciated and overworked. But in her truly unique style, Dana is the first to laugh at the mishaps of life and loves to write about the humorous side of Mom-dom.
A native cheese-head, whose passions include mt. biking, whitewater kayaking, cross-country skiing, reading and writing, Dana has performed some stand-up comedy and storytelling in the Milwaukee area and hopes to one day find the time to write a book. She currently resides in Waukesha with her husband Charlie and her two little boys and runs her own company, http://www.openleafexcursions.com/. She also moderates a community forum on which people can share and discover places in the outdoors. http://www.adventuregroove.com/
Source: http://www.womenfavor.com/women-interests/ovaries-chocolate-and-dead-people.html
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